Defrost?

Last week, my mother was driving my car for a few days. Why, you ask, would I let my precious, precious hippie mobile to be put in the hands of a slow-driving lunatic? Well, her A/C went out, and I can't handle my poor mother burning up in the Texas heat. Ahh….I know, sometimes I have a heart.

The problem was that the air was cool, it just wasn't coming out of the vents. I had something similar happen in a previous car and knew that it probably meant the fan was out which was far less expensive than replacing or fixing the entire A/C unit. I've done that too, and it was more expensive than the car was worth.

So, the plan was she was to drop her car off on Thursday, I would come and get her, give her my car and on Saturday while I was in Houston my friend would come and pick her up to get the car when it was finished. Well, Thursday night, she drives her car home and has no problems and told me that it was fixed. I was amazed at the mechanics efficiency and left it at that. She offered up no other information, and I thought that was that.

Then when I came home from Houston on Sunday, she told me that she had to tell me what was wrong with her car. I was hesitant to ask since last time this happened she had backed into someone in the parking lot of my job costing her $2,000.

What followed has to be the funniest mom story ever.

The night before the horrible A/C going out incident of 2006 it had rained out, and mom's windows were fogging up so she had turned on the defroster things because she couldn't see.
I bet you know where this is going, don't you?

Well, she drove home, turned off the car, went inside and didn't think a thing of it.
Next day, got in car, started it, and the A/C wasn't working. Of course it wasn't working, it was on defrost.

She spent three days worrying and fretting about getting her A/C fixed, when all she had to do was actually turn it on. Thank God the mechanic didn't charge her for this, since he got more than enough payment in seeing the look on her face when she realized what she had done. I'm sure it will be a story that goes 'round for years. I know I'll certainly spread it around that long, and pass it on for generations.

So what if it's been four months?

What's it to you?

I love CNN, and when I go to sleep, I have it going on my TV, just in case I wake up to pee, and something has happened.

To you it might be crazy, but today it proved not such a crazy quirk after all.

I woke up around 4:00 to go potty, and saw "Holy crap, breaking news, the world is coming to an end..." banners on CNN. In reality, al-Zarqawi had been killed which in itself is big news. It is, the president says so.

But that's beside the point. This website is about my crazy mother, isn't it?

I talk to my mother every morning before she goes to work. Really, it's her talking, and me grunting as I'm still asleep and just talking to her until she stops yammering and I figure I will call her later to find out what she really wants to talk about. It's normally nothing, but she's my mother, right?

So this morning, in an excitement that normally only Christmas morning brings, she proclaimed to me that they finally had bombed Zimbabwe.

Yes, she said Zimbabwe.

Thankfully my CNN watching habits serve me well, and I knew what she was talking about so I was able to to play with her a bit.

I then asked, "the entire country?"

"No, just Zimbabwe."

"The country, they bombed the entire country?"

"No, just Zim-bab-we!"

Yes, I'm this evil.

"What did Zimbabwe ever do to us?"

"Oh...you know, the terrorism and stuff!"

"Zimbabwe? The country in Africa? I didn't think they were known for their terroristic activities!"

"No, no, no, the guy...the Bin Laden guy...you know, Zim something or other."

At this point I let the poor soul off the hook, and I told her that I knew what she was talking about.

So, contrary to popular Christopher theories that my mother just can't hear me because I have a whiny voice, so he says, she really can't hear anyone.

There's a dose for you. I know that there are letters piled up in my email from months ago, that have since tapered off since people think my mother was being aloof and didn't answer them, we've just had a busy couple of months.

In other Mumsy news, she is officially one step closer to retirement, and as promised she will be plugged in and ready to correspond with everyone and give her advice first hand. She now has a laptop that she's really unsure of how to use, but she's able to check her emails which impresses me beyond belief.